Every day and every night it seems that I am alone. I spend my mornings and days alone and trapped within unfriendly walls. It is so quiet. Too quiet for my taste. Day to day I see so many people and yet this feeling of exile does not diminish. Friends do not exist for me. My own mother does not even answer my calls. Why is it that I am so easily dismissed?...
The days are drifting by so fast in all of my loneliness. All day I spend my time doodling and dreaming of the most beautiful romance anyone could possibly imagine. It has to be tangible! True love does exist...I can feel it. It is out there. It just seems so far away from me.
There are many things that I need to worry about that are "more important". However, Love and Art is the only thing I want to be able to focus on. I want to have a friend to paint with and lover who makes me feel beautiful in every aspect. I want my lover to kiss me like he needs me and to hold me as if he is scared I will just slip away...I really do not know what to do when it comes to the World of Love.
It seems that I fail at my World of Art too...
It seems that it takes me forever to just finish one decent piece. I create many pieces in between the good ones but they are such CRAP! Currently I have two pieces that I almost have finished. I am proud of both of them and I love them so. However, the one still needs a lot of work on the background and it is giving me some trouble. The other is almost completely finished. I just need to draw one more hand. BUT I HAVE DRAWN IT AT LEAST 20 TIMES ALREADY!!! This always happens. I almost finish a piece and then I just cant do it for some stupid reason...ugh....
I feel so defeated...
The days are drifting by so fast in all of my loneliness. All day I spend my time doodling and dreaming of the most beautiful romance anyone could possibly imagine. It has to be tangible! True love does exist...I can feel it. It is out there. It just seems so far away from me.
There are many things that I need to worry about that are "more important". However, Love and Art is the only thing I want to be able to focus on. I want to have a friend to paint with and lover who makes me feel beautiful in every aspect. I want my lover to kiss me like he needs me and to hold me as if he is scared I will just slip away...I really do not know what to do when it comes to the World of Love.
It seems that I fail at my World of Art too...
It seems that it takes me forever to just finish one decent piece. I create many pieces in between the good ones but they are such CRAP! Currently I have two pieces that I almost have finished. I am proud of both of them and I love them so. However, the one still needs a lot of work on the background and it is giving me some trouble. The other is almost completely finished. I just need to draw one more hand. BUT I HAVE DRAWN IT AT LEAST 20 TIMES ALREADY!!! This always happens. I almost finish a piece and then I just cant do it for some stupid reason...ugh....
I feel so defeated...
